Skip to content

Category Archives: adventures

the vicar or whatever – a response

The preceding is a pretty piece of writing, but I expected better from an accomplished mixologist like Ouroboros. Maybe a little of the real history to go with it? And I’ll be blunt: that recipe needs work. Look, I’ve been to Scotland, I’ve drunk the Vicar or whatever in its birthplace.

The Buy-Back: Getting comfortable in NYC

“Next round’s on me.” That’s when you know you’ve got the bartender in your pocket. It’s New York City and you know your bars. You will juice your local dive for whatever amenities you can find: free jukebox, cheap pool table, even free food. You will not pay more than five dollars per pint. Five […]

A Winding, Mostly Pointless Story About Booze

Some time ago, between the time when Jurassic Park left theatres and Dummy hit the airwaves, we acquired a case of Bud Light through the aide of some false identification and some liquor store clerks who could be described as “less than vigilant.” Sitting on a tree stump by the froggie pond knocking back twenty […]

circling the abyss like a shark

Once a year the Deschutes Brewery in Bend Oregon produces an imperial stout, a portion of which is aged in new oak, in (used) bourbon, and in (used) pinot noir barrels. It is a dark dark liquid, thick (leaves legs on the side of a glass), high alcohol (10-11%), and designed to improve with age. […]

Second Class on the Overnight to Drunkistan, or The Boozy Foreigners – Part 1

Being the first tale in the adventures of three travelers learning the international language of liquor Catalunya was on fire. No train was going to make it through to Barcelona for at least a day, so in Perpignan we were packed onto a tourbus with all the kids south of Paris, goddamn, it looked like. […]

A report on some new hardware

Chicago Ted basically shamed me into buying a flask. (This is the second major favor he’s done me. The first was a free pack of Chinese cigarettes.) I bought this one, and a funnel to go with it. Now I drink every day, but I drink especially on Thursdays. So last night, despite that my […]

A very long paragraph describing the only bone I’ve ever broken while drunk

This is from a draft of a novel I’m writing. At this point in the story, the perspective has switched to third-person from first-, and the narrator is now a plastic action figure. Really. It’s a true story. Please don’t think I’m a hack because this one paragraph is so long. The book has many […]