Yep, non-alcoholic. Beer.
Why bother?
Plenty of reasons. Maybe you’re knocked up, or trying to cut down on the liver damage, or taking a medicine what ain’t booze compatible, or what-have-you. The fact is sometimes you want to hang out and have the taste of an oat soda from a longneck like everybody else. We can respect that. The truth of the matter is nobody will know you’re drinking a diet oat soda unless they study the label. The labels, suspiciously, look like regular beer labels. So they’ll have to study hard, which will be a problem unless they’re suckin’ back one of these.
So, wanna try one? PRO-TIP: go continental.
Forget anything domestic, it’ll taste even more like fizzy water than the regular stuff. The best two I’ve had were Clausthaler & Kaliber.
Clausthaler has a nice afterbite of hops, much like a continental ale. Not much body, but you shouldn’t expect any. NA beer is about sacrifices, like sacrificing your future to the city council of Bethesda, Maryland. Oh, sorry… got a lot on my mind lately.
The other brand worth trying is Kaliber. This is more like a lager style. It is far maltier with a sweet taste. No real bite of hops to speak of.
Neither could every be mistaken for regular beer, but they’re worth a shot if you’re on the wagon. Sometimes you can’t/shan’t drink alcohol and we understand. We just want you to have a good time while doing it, and sometimes one of these faux brews will help you feel better about the tough decisions one must make in life. And hopefully you’ll be able to enjoy a regular brew at some time in the future.
But if you’re not drinking actual beer, do the rest of us a favor and be the designated driver or the you-fly-I-buy pilot for a liquor run, OK?
